Friday, February 5, 2010

Things that bug me more than usual when I'm pregnant-a vent


You can bet that this will become a regular installment. Especially in the last few months or pregnancy.

Pregnant women are irritable. This is only news to you if you've never spent more than 5 minutes around a pregnant woman. In general, I'm one of those fairly obnoxious "I love pregnancy even with the sickness/aches/pains" kinds of people. But as my husband and close friends can tell you, I'm happy to share the things that bug me. I mean REALLY bug me.

First up:
The pregnant women who insist that they are feeling their baby move at 6, or 7 weeks. Really people. Especially if you've done this whole pregnancy thing before, you should know that a 6 week embryo is roughly between the size of an apple seed and a raisin and is just starting to get arm and leg buds. It's not dancing around inside you to the point that you can feel it. Hate to burst your bubble! Your baby looks like this:


And just for size reference, this is roughly how things stack up:


I know-creepy little face on that thing, but that is what size a 6wk embryo is.

Don't get me wrong-I'm not the jerk who goes around telling these women they are full of it, or more likely just misguided, but I am rolling my eyes when I read it or hear it.

Next up, and along those same lines, the "I can feel my baby kicking! And so can my husband! Right up here by my belly button!"
Now wait-when that happens, it is truly a magical moment. I will sit for hours and just relish in feeling my baby move and wiggle and kick and stretch. But when you are still in your first trimester (latest offender-an 11weeker, first pregnancy), you are not feeling your baby kick you up by your belly button. You've just got some seriously crazy intestinal issues. Either that or your dates are horribly far off!

The whole movement misconception gets me feeling very Dr Cox-ish. (Scrubs anyone?)

Don't get me wrong-I do truly think that some women can feel those first flutters very early-but if that's what you're really feeling, it's waaaaay down low, and certainly not strong enough for someone else to feel.

I get that I'm kind of a pregnancy nutcase. It's a running joke between my husband and I. After I made plans to become a doula (I readily admit that I never finished certifying-didn't attend the required number of births b/c my own growing family took priority), doing gross amounts of research and reading and my own pregnancies, I feel like I know a tad more than the average person.

Funny thing is, if most people would just pick up a decent pregnancy book (and please get at least one more book beyond your standard "What to Expect" deal), they would know what is actually happening with their bodies.

And that's all for today's vent. Now I will go eat some chocolate and get back to my cheery self.

But just for the record, I know that I'm not the only hormonal pregnant woman that gets especially bugged by little things.

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